Do you know where you go when you are not present? Dissociation and elaborate internal world experiences.

So, I just have to ask others who have Dissociative Identity Disorder, do you know where you go when you are not present?

Sometimes it feels like sleep or like you were just daydreaming and not really focusing. Or like a blink and time is missing.

As we have connected more, co conscious more, we have built a very elaborate internal world. That is where some of us go. It started with therapy, where we would visualize comforting things for the children, or visualize a place they could go play, a playroom of sorts, so they were not present during adult things or things that may be bad for young minds to witness. This practice evolved to something more.

Vividly we visualize a representation of each of our thoughts/voices, shooting around in here. We all “materialize” before each other and have our “conference” on whatever we all know about that is happening. It’s so elaborate I’ve a whole house with many rooms on top of our own separate bedrooms, and you can walk out onto a porch for a view of a field of tall grass that ends in a wooded area. I’m not delusional, I understand this isn’t physically happening, but it feels a very real experience at times. So, sometimes when we have inner struggles, we get a visual to represent it. Physical altercations, even. Sometimes our representation will resemble how we feel, even beaten and bruised. We can even be the cause of it to each other. Especially if we are fighting on who should be “in control.” It’s strange. I’m slowly figuring this out.

I just wondered if anyone else diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder had ever had an elaborate “internal world” experience, or something similar, where they built their own conference area to communicate, seeing each other as each other’s truest selves and form.

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